Comments on: Best of the Blog 2009: Kiss of Death: Loose Lips

By: Liz

Liz — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 22:08:36 +0000

Wonderful post, relevant in our “rude is cool” culture.

Great comments on accountability and bridge-building rather bridge-burning.

A couple of other issues…effectiveness and acceptability to God. Strong opinions can be expressed in a gracious way. Strong opinions may possibly be given more serious consideration when gracious than when snarky.

“Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt…” Grace seasons our words like salt seasons food to make it more palatable. When the goal is to influence a receptive listener, use grace. When the goal is to be acceptable to God, use grace.

“Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer.” Psalm 19:14

By: patjeannedavis

patjeannedavis — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 00:36:08 +0000

Wendy,this post and the comments were a blessing.
As lights in a dark world our speech both in writing and verbally should to be seasoned with gentleness. Asking WWJD and being in prayer will keep us from saying hasty and unkind words. I tell my teens this although they don’t see the importance now.

By: Julie Surface Johnson

Julie Surface Johnson — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 15:46:21 +0000

Regardless of how “modern” the world has become, it’s never old-fashioned or out-of-style to protect the feelings of others. Last I looked, people have the same sensibilities they always have.

When it’s necessary to critique a work or behavior, speaking the truth in love is scripturally mandated and socially acceptable. Give me a winsome response anyday!!!

Thanks for another great post, Wendy.

By: Ann H. Gabhart

Ann H. Gabhart — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 17:28:03 +0000

Great advice, Wendy. Ah, to be an encourager in all that I do, say or write – that’s a prize to reach for.

By: Cat Woods

Cat Woods — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 15:52:54 +0000

I sent notices to a wide range of people about my blog. I included family, my pastor, my co-workers, friends and people I know well from committees.

What does that mean for me? It means I actively write to appeal to a large group of people while trying hard not to offend any of them. I know that at times, someone can take offence inadvertantly, however, it was a self imposed act that makes me present myself to a higher standard.

I try to be professional at all times, knowing that what I say does impact someone-somewhere on a very personal level. I fully understand that what I say and how I say it impacts my desire to become a successful author and a compassionate human being.

I don’t think you should have one without the other.

Thanks for the thought provoking post.

By: Jumpstart Your Writing Dreams | Between the Lines

Jumpstart Your Writing Dreams | Between the Lines — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 15:08:38 +0000

[...] career. We addressed several mistakes that can negatively affect your career– things like loose lips, quitting the day job too soon, attempting to write all over the map or trying too hard to [...]

By: Crystal Laine Miller

Crystal Laine Miller — Fri, 15 May 2009 02:38:16 +0000

Here’s another aspect to this “loose lips” topic–when you’ve entered a writing contest and then publicly criticize and belittle the judges over the scoring. When you call the judges names and complain bitterly about the judging–even if there are legitimate complaints–it causes ripples. Just choose not to do it.

If you have issues, go directly to the contact person for the contest, don’t post it on writer lists or blogs.You never know who is listening or where that judge’s influence lies.

This is such excellent advice, Wendy.

By: sally apokedak

sally apokedak — Thu, 14 May 2009 21:52:07 +0000

I understand that you’re talking about building a career, Wendy. And I agree with you.

I’ve been struggling with this personally, though, wondering how far to take it.

There are a lot of Christian authors publishing children’s books, but when you go to their sites they don’t say anything about being Christian. You wouldn’t know it from their books or websites. They have gone into the closet.

But the gay authors are out and proud. And they have no more tolerance for those who don’t affirm them than Perez Hilton has.

It’s an interesting turn of events.

http://tiny.cc/U9M4e

By: Nikki Hahn

Nikki Hahn — Thu, 14 May 2009 18:12:31 +0000

Wonderful article! Maybe following the Bible would be a good thing to do when blogging or facebooking? Always stay upbeat and if you criticize, do it with brotherly love.

When I had to critique a book on Amazon, I tried to be gentle. It was a little hard to get into said book, but by the middle of the book, it became a page-turner. I pointed out two items of concern. The swear words were too frequent and a scene was somehow lost and didn’t resolve itself. However, I did point out it was pretty good. I’m hoping I wasn’t harsh.

By: D. D. Tannenbaum

D. D. Tannenbaum — Thu, 14 May 2009 16:06:27 +0000

First and foremost, when commenting on a story or any type, comment on the story itself, not the writer. Never, ever make comments about the writer’s skill or character. Focus on the story and only the story. Second, comment on a story the way you would like to have your story commented on. “Do unto others…” is a great creed to follow in reading and writing!